A Letter to My Love

To my soulmate,

Love is a longing that never leaves you, be it a minute, an hour, days, years. However, that isn’t how it starts out.

At first love is this unknowable concept, a faraway star in the night sky that you ponder at with young eyes and let your imagination go wild with all the stories of princesses and knights in shining armor. Time passes, you get a little older and you find love feels even farther away than you thought. So distant and obscure that perhaps it doesn’t exist, and all those songs about love are just there perpetuating the lie to make dreamers feel better.

Your heart has never felt more lonely or forgotten. Still, you push on and try to ignore love and ignore the Schrödinger’s cat of its existence. And that is the moment when it finds you. 

When you find that one person who opens your eyes to the fairytale concept of love, who breathes into you the idea that soulmates truly exist, where life without them becomes unbearable from the simple having to leave for work to the gut-wrenching realization you might one day never see them again. A desperation builds between your lungs, something between fear and desire to dedicate all your time to it because love, you find, makes you happy unlike anything else ever has.

And thus there it stands: A single flower in a barren field. Don’t look away, don’t let go, keep your hands cupped around the delicate petals for otherwise they might blow away and leave the field with nothing. But you know you can’t stay there forever. There are duties and tasks to see to, yet you’re so scared that ever looking away will make this amazing, precious thing vanish. But you have to, and your love tells you it will be okay, wants you to not destroy yourself and your life for them. How could you say no to that, say no to someone who says you make them happy and wishes you happiness in all aspects of life?

Eventually you remove your hands, having faith and hope that this love and gift of a person attached to it will never disappear. You hold on to them with the comforting knowledge that the roots have grown deep and can withstand any storm. Solace is found when you realize they feel and fear and long the same, that you are their flower. You both will go on with your lives, still making sure that the planted love stays strong and healthy, but also realize it would shine even brighter amongst a garden of happiness. You plan and laugh and build up the Eden your lives will one day be.

That flower of love remains special, a circular bed built just for it, elevating it to the heights it deserves. It is two gold rings to declare your love to each other and the world, a promise that this love will remain even once all organic matter dies and there’s only your souls left.

For our souls are forever intertwined, my love, from this life to the next.

– From your other half